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Jesus is a song that Woody Johnson had sung while his free history lesson of Jesus Christ coming to earth was presented.

Lyrics Edit

JESUS! Came to earth in a ball of fire!

JESUS! He killed all the dinosaurs! "Jesus smashes through a Triceratops and rips apart an Ankylosaurus in half"

JESUS! Upper cut a T-rex! "Jesus punches a T-rex in the face"

JESUS! Karate kick that motherfuckaaaaa!!! "Jesus is running on a Brachiosaurus and kicks its' head off"

JESUS! Shooting fire balls and lightning bolts! "Jesus drops a gigantic pile of dead dinosaur corpses into a pit and uses his fire and lightning powers to melt them down into petroleum oil"

JESUS! Making oil for Republicans! "Republican men are cheering for this, as Jesus flies down with a barrel of oil ready to hand over to them"

JEEEESSUUSSSS!!! *Billy Long and Jesus high-5"

Woody: And that's pretty much it. Cue the theme song!

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